As the leaves turn and the afternoons grow short, Squeak and Crumb Bakery presents its autumn collection. We have worked hard, slept harder, and come up with a menu that we believe will warm the whiskers of every customer.
The Pumpkin Mouse
A classic. Soft pumpkin dough, a hint of nutmeg, and a faint expression of surprise. Each mouse is dusted with a little cinnamon and has a tiny orange tail. It is the only mouse we make that smells like a cosy afternoon.
The Apple Turnover, Miniature
A flaky pastry the size of a thumb. It contains one slice of apple, which we consider generous. The turnover is not mouse shaped, which has confused some customers, but we felt that every menu needs one rebel.
Cinnamon Whiskers
Thin twists of buttery pastry, baked until crisp, then dipped in cinnamon sugar. They look like whiskers and taste like a warm blanket. They are best eaten slowly, and ideally while someone else is cleaning up.
Maple Cheese Danish
For those who cannot choose between sweet and savoury, we have created a danish with both. It has divided our staff. Half call it genius. The other half call it a mistake, then eat three.
- Pumpkin Mouse: available daily
- Apple Turnover, Miniature: available until noon
- Cinnamon Whiskers: available by the dozen
- Maple Cheese Danish: available when we remember
Pairing Suggestions
Each treat goes well with a bowl of warm milk, a patch of sun, or a quiet corner. We do not recommend pairing treats with a dog, a vacuum cleaner, or an opinion.
We look forward to seeing you in the shop. Please wipe your paws.
A Note on Ingredients
All of our autumn treats are made with real butter, real sugar, and a quantity of pure determination. We do not use anything that cannot be pronounced by a cat, which rules out most things, and also rules out the word cinnamon, which we pronounce as meow.
Orders for the autumn menu will open on Monday. Please stand in line quietly, or at least quietly enough that we can ignore you.
This menu is fictional satire.